The Sign

I find if I quietly wait, and ask God for answers or directions they always come to me. The key is to know what to look for around you. There is nothing placed in your path or pain view that was not intended to be clue to the next step in life. Some of the signs are subtle and some are profound. It is as if life is a giant game. Each step of the way you need to roll the dice or spin the wheel to find out how to progress to the end of the game. Along the way you see clues to how to proceed next in your life. I have found the messages come from all kinds of sources.

I live my life fully aware of all around me. Higher messages from God come from people, nature or just subtle feelings. I find myself in never ending doubt of my own intuition. Even though, I have been blessed with a keen sense within myself, an inner knowing of how I should proceed in life, if I do not see it manifesting around me I begin to have self doubt and fear. The truth is I know before I can actually see the manifestation before me. You would think having a gift like this since birth and endless validations that my keen sense never fails me would be enough. Yet, I live in doubt of my own gifts.

I always speech about not knowing how matters will proceed or end up. It is true when I am confused, hurt, tired, or lost I do not know. My radar is down. At these times I pray for guidance. If I can get to a place of peace, God always shows me the way. Given the last week, last year or last three years have been horribly challenging I find myself in continuous prayer. If I am present God always delivers a sign for the next right step. You can only see the messages if you are very aware and do not dismiss something that catches your eye. The simple fact you have your attention draw to a person, part of nature or feeling is a way God is speaking to you.

I happen to know how my situation will end up with my love. I know already. It has not, yet even transpired. How do I know? First, I know from a gut feeling. Of course, since I already said I doubt my own God given gift that is not enough. God, being patience as He is with his children, then presents more information that
seems more concrete. In this case, I have been so lost in my own guidance system He has not once, twice or three times sent me the same message from different people, but He has given the same message to me five times. At first, I thought the message was coming from well meaning people that hated to see me in pain. Finally, after the fifth person delivered the same exact, almost word for word dialogue I paused to realize this meant something. I began to think this is not people giving me words I want to hear, it is words they believe about my life, an outcome they see. Ironically, following this light bulb moment, I came upon an article that supported the information I was receiving. I am not going to disclose what I have learned. I will simply say, time is of the essence here. That my life is unfolding on God’s timeline and not mine.

It would be really nice if I had more faith in myself and God for that matter. I am still learning that in fear I panic. As my therapist say, when we are stressed we regress. I believe that with all my heart. Until I reach a new level of faith in myself, at least I can know for sure God will keep sending me the support to know what is the next step or at least knowledge of what will happen eventually. The most important thing right now is I must focus on self. It is easy to loss a sense of self in a deep emotional soul connection. I must focus on my true purpose here for awhile. Once I reestablish my purpose the pieces of the puzzle will fall into place.

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